Mermaid Marathon Reads – Week two

I joined Maci Dierking’s Instagram challenge with a mermaid bookish theme. Her Instagram is thebrightsidegirl and I felt the prompts were fun and would encourage me to post more.

Mermaid Marathon Reads

Click here to see my posts for Mermaid Marathon Reads week one. The challenge encouraged me to post everyday and that continued into week two (almost).

Current read

In hind sight, I could have used this for my Wednesday post as I currently have a few books on the go.

Vacay vibes

Boat read

Mermaid on the cover

Still to post…

Pirates

Island read

Fave read of the week

So that’s it for this challenge. But now would probably be a good time to remind you that Ocean Heart is currently half price in the Smashwords Summer Sale (July 2022).

If you enjoyed this you might like:

Like, subscribe, & follow me

[kofi]

Reading Challenge: Red Blood by Kaitlyn Legaspi

About the challenge

The challenge was set by World Indie Warriors on Instagram. They created three #WIWBingo boards; YA, Romance, and Fantasy.

The aim is to read and review the books on Instagram and tag @worldindiewarriors

The goal is to get three in a line, and help indie books get seen.

I’m doing the challenge. I’ve already read some of the books on the board so I’ll be reposting them this month, and I’m hoping to read some new one too.

The Book Review

Here is my post of my old review for Red Blood by Kaitlyn Legaspi. I shortened it for social media.

[Kofi]

If you enjoyed this you will like:

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Behind the Book: Chasing Sunrise by Emily Mah

What to watch if you love super powers

Below are some affiliate links. To learn more about these please visit my Affiliate Disclosure Page.

Happy MerMay 2021

Hello my mermaid loving readers. It’s the month of mermaids and MerMay 2021 is going to be MerMazing!

#MerMay

Readalong with Hannah Read

Author Hannah Read has created a MerMay readathon for May! She has encouraged people to get her novel Tenebrasco and set chapter goals throughout the month, so we can read along together.

As a mermaid fiction author myself, this sounded like so much fun. I’ve downloaded the book to my Kindle and despite being a slow reader I will try my best to keep up.

Follow #MerMayReadalong , #PearlWielders & @hannah.reads on Instagram.

The below are affiliate links. Read Affiliate Disclosure page for more info.

Newsletter Reward

I want to do something special to celebrate MerMay and Ocean Heart’s 6 month birthday is on 1 June.

I invited my newsletter subscribers to enter a giveaway. They’ll also be invited first to read Sky Heart when it is ready for readers.

Later this month, I will extend this invitation to my Instagram followers.

Google Play

Ocean Heart is now available to buy on Google Play. To celebrate I have made the book FREE worldwide during the first week of May.

If you haven’t yet got a copy of Ocean Heart and you are a Google Books reader, now is your chance to treat yourself.

Check it out here.

Free Digital Download

I have been developing my technical skills to produce digital products. I decided to share my Book Tracker as a free download from my Ko-Fi Shop.

In addition, I’ve posted a link there that enables Ko-Fi fans to download Ocean Heart for free from Google Play ALL month.

It’s Free to follow me on Ko-Fi, so why not? That way you can enjoy the freebies and won’t miss out on future freebies.

Apple iBooks

ITunes Connect’s webpage is currently not loading on the page that allows new authors to join. The technical team have apologised for the issues and are working on resolving these.

Update: 30 May, I managed to create an author account but I think I have to wait 24h to add a book. So maybe later this month I’ll be on Apple. 🤞

Ocean Charity

I want to donate to an Ocean charity. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for ages and there are so many good ones out there.

I recently watched Seapiracy on Netflix and it reminded me of how crucial the ocean is to all of us.

This month I will pick a charity and donate. Let me know if you have any recommendations.

If you enjoyed this you will like:

What to watch if you love mermaids

Book Review : Sea Witch by Sarah Henning

Book Review: Mermaid School by Lucy Courtenay

About Ocean Heart

2021 Goals!

This year, I’ve really struggled with creating my goals. The problem is there’s so much I want to do but where to start?

I know if I have too many plates spinning, they’ll all crash. As I’m writing this it’s January 1st and I’m finally choosing my goals after agonizing over them for two weeks. And… I may still tweak them before this post goes live.

Personal

Skincare routine: Over the years, I’ve tried loads countless products and I’m constantly changing my routine. During 2021, I plan to finalise my skincare products which I think will benefit my skin.

I hate waste so I need to use up products I already have, and it also depends on money too. I’ve already decided on the products and look forward to sharing these with you as I buy them.

Visit Hollowtree Farm: Fear of the virus and lockdowns reduced the number of places we visited. We even had a gift voucher for a fun day at the farm and never got to go. They’ve said it doesn’t expire so this is a priority for 2021!

Self care: I never have time to indulge in things like doing my nails or a face mask. So, I’m planning to reward myself with products to support this when I hit my other goals.

Writing

Sky Heart: This is the BIG one. I want to finish book 2 in the Soul Heart series. But… there are many steps to a published book so this will likely take me all year.

Publishing a Novel To Do List

For accountability, I’m going to tweet my progress every Sunday.

Novella 1: I’m working on two novella’s but I want to finish “Denny’s story” first. I’m thinking of using it as a readers magnet.

Novella 2: This project will be on standby and only worked on if I’m waiting on stuff for the other writing projects. This is ”Luna’s story”. I’m still working on the titles of my novellas.

Ocean Heart: I have ideas to do something special in Mer-May. But, I can’t say more until I’ve figured out the details.

Reading

10 Books: Yes, it sounds low but when I’m busy on a writing project I only read a chapter or two a night making my progress very slow. 2020 I only just hit my goal of 12 books. 😂

I do only record fiction books but I also read a few non-fiction books on writing. I’m hoping to review these on my YouTube channel this year, as well as other bookish content.

I will keep posting my reviews to my blog, Goodreads, Amazon, Book Bub, Litsy, if able to. I will track my reading goal on Goodreads.

Goodreads/Litsy/Book Bub/Book Sniffer: I’ve used Goodreads for a few years but never been very active. I hope to improve that and get better at using the other reading social apps. Which brings me on nicely to my next goal…

Social Media

Website update: I’m going to quarterly review my website content to check it is up to date. And, update during that month.

Shop: Okay, it’s not social media but it is connected to my website. I’m trying to create a shop on my website but struggling. I will master it! I mastered moving my website during my book launch.

Trial Canva Pro: I love Canva and been tempted to pay for the pro version. But now there’s a scheduled too. It would be incredible to have everything in one place.

I bought Planoly during my book launch so I could schedule videos and carousels on IG. There’s been a few occasions it hasn’t posted, so I’m tempted to try other schedulers.

Consistently Post: This went really well this year for my blog and Instagram. I want to continue it and add YouTube and Twitter to my goals.

  • Blog: Mon, & Thurs
  • IG: Mon, Weds, & Fri
  • YT: Tue (fortnightly)
  • Twitter: Sun
  • Newsletter: end of month (was every other month)

Followers/Reviews: I’ve seen people track their followers growth. I’ve never done this but it’s a good idea. I will aim for a 20% increase over all platforms.

2021 Followers Count

I’d love to reach 10k on Instagram as it opens up certain features but it feels still too far out of reach. Until I worked out what 20% was, I was thinking of aiming for 5k by June. I think 4687 is more realistic and although social media helps with marketing my passion is writing.

My Facebook page has been around longer than my group. The Soul Heart Readers group was created in October to help with Ocean Heart’s release. I’m hoping members will stick around for Sky Heart – I’ll need BETA and ARC readers later this year.

I use Parler the same way I use Twitter, and really like the platform. My numbers grew fast when I first joined but has now slowed down. It’ll be interesting to see which of the two platforms has more growth in 2021.

My YouTube channel is very new, I’m not sure how fast it will grow. I’ll also be posting to Odysee to try out the new platform – I’ve not used it yet. Over the Christmas break, I created a new Intro & Outro which I’m looking forward to using.

Reviews: I have a page on my website where I’ve collected my favourite reviews of Ocean Heart, and directed readers to where the original can be found.

Reviews are really important for a books visibility, so I will be tracking how many I have and – eek – remind my readers to leave reviews.

January Goals

Listing my goals for only this month looks like a lot. Eek 😬

Personal

  • Record unboxing of Naturismo box (then start using products)

Writing

  • Sky Heart: Write 5k per week – track progress on Google sheet. Share progress on Twitter/Parler for accountability

Reading

  • Set annual reading goal on Goodreads
  • Finish reading Cinderella is Dead (paperback) – track progress on Goodreads
  • Finish reading Winter Trials (eBook) – track progress on Goodreads

Social Media

  • Update website content
  • Add shop to website
  • Blog & IG: Create January content & make a start on February content (aim to always be two weeks ahead)
  • Record, edit, schedule two YouTube/Odysee videos
  • Try out Canva pro – if scheduler is good, cancel Planoly
  • Weekly Twitter/Parler accountability post

[kofi]

If you enjoyed this you will like:

About Ocean Heart

My 2020 Book Reviews

Looking back at 2020

My Links Page

How I did my book foot stack photo

Have you seen my #footstack pic on Instagram? Check out the feed @Nic_Reads_Inheels for my heel stack inspiration.

I only discovered #footstack very recently. It is a pic of someone balancing books on their shoes. When the #CampNanoWIW prompt was a #shelfie pic, I decided it was the perfect opportunity to give it a go.

I had so much fun doing this. And, when I posted it people asked, are they your legs, your books, your pic, how?

The answer is Yes and this is how.

The original pic

I wasn’t going to share this pic but here you go.

Unedited #FootStack

The books I bought from Amazon, Book Festivals or won on Instagram. They are all from my never ending TBR pile.

Since having children, I don’t have many heels. I also tidied away the ones I did have and have no idea where I put them. These shoes are my work ones from Clarks.

The red stockings were bought years ago from Ann Summers, back when I felt more daring, and haven’t been seen outside the bedroom. 😉

I did need help to get this pic. My husband stacked the books whilst I giggled upside down and tried to hold steady. My selection was rather ambitious and I realised this was my limit… no more books.

He then took the pic for me. He actually took quite a few as we tested my balancing skills at different degrees of steepness. We found it looks better the straighter my leg are. Posing like this was a full on workout.

How I edited the pic

Pic Monkey App

I used the Pic Monkey App to remove the background using their Cut Out, Smart, tool. It was super easy.

Unsplash

Unsplash is my favourite site to get free photos. I found this photo of a pretty yellow wall by Mona Eendra from Copenhagen. Yellow is one of my brand colours so this was perfect.

Pretty yellow wall from Unsplash

Photoshop Mix App

This app enables you to layer images together. I created a project and added the wall as my first layer, then my cut out image as the second layer. I then cropped it to a square and adjusted the two layers until I was happy with the positioning.

I had never used this app before and it was very straight forward. I figured it out without watching the tutorials. But, I’m going to return to watch them later to discover more.

Instagram App

The final edit was done using IG’s filter Clarendon. Then, I added my comment and tags and posted it.

If you give this a go, please tag me. I’m @Redfae on Instagram. I’d love to see your book stacks too.

If you enjoyed this, you will like:

Writer’s Hashtags Collection

Camp NaNo Progress Days 11 to 20

The Story Snippets Challenge on Instagram

Beta Readers vs Arc Readers

Reflecting on Camp NaNo July 2019

July has been a challenging month for my writing goals. For Camp NaNo I decided to make a start on book 2, Diamond in the Sky but it has been full of distractions! I’m hoping August will be more productive for my writing.

Distraction 1: Course Work

I needed to finish my coursework for the Working Together Community Course. I must admit I had been putting off the assignments to work on my writing and as the deadline to submit approached I had to prioritise it and get it done. I have really enjoyed volunteering and everyone at the school has been lovely. On my last day, I got a card from the teachers and signed by all the children and chocolates.

Distraction 2: Blog

I didn’t make any progress on my Camp NaNo project until day 7 and I quickly realised that I needed to do some more planning. Not only that but my blog was also in need of some attention. I need to write up about all the fun I had at Felixstowe Book Festival. I then spent the next few evenings prepping some posts.

After a little plotting and scheduling, I was ready to write and decided to sign up to Mandi Lynn’s #10kWritingChallenge. I knew there was no chance I could write 10k in one day with my other commitments but I knew if I aimed high, I would achieve something great. I wrote 2,792 new words for Diamond in the Sky. I was back on track for my Camp NaNo goal.

Turns out Mandi Lynn didn’t make 10k either. She vlogged about her struggles and celebrated the words she did achieve. She encourages people to sign up to next months 10k challenge and win a pin.

Distraction 3: Important dates

The end of July and start of August have some important dates for me.

Husband distractions: It is my husband’s birthday month. I needed to sort out his gift and I wanted to take him out somewhere child free. I arranged for his sister to babysit. I also got Aria to print her feet in his card and Noah to write a personal message.

Valerie Patisserie

Also, last month, my hubby got a little neglected as the end of Jewel of the Sea got closer, so I promised to watch Stranger Things with him – which was awesome.

Noah distractions: My son was finishing his first year of school (Reception class).

I think it is nice for kids to make their teacher a card or gift so I had to come up with an idea and organise the craft.

We got to go to Noah’s first sports day. I also decided to arrange a night out with the playground mums and get the ball rolling on some summer play dates.

Aria’s distractions: Aria’s first birthday is at the start of August. I have been busy arranging her cake smash and splash and worked with the photographer to create a very personal experience (more coming soon).

I’ve also been planning her parties. Yes! That was ‘party’ as a plural. She is a very lucky girl.

Distraction 4: Pitching

SFFpip was this month. It was my first time taking part in this Twitter pitch event and I got a like by a publisher! Naturally, I have then had to research them to decided if the feeling is mutual.

If writing up about Felixstowe Book Festival was my distraction at the start of the month, then YALC was my distraction at the end. The closer the date got, the more excited I became. I went to bed early the night before and barely slept a wink. I can’t believe it, I pitched to two agents – one of them I have stalked on Twitter for years – and they both asked me to send them Jewel of the Sea – Aghhh!

Now, my distraction is trying to write the perfect query letter. As I have mentioned in previous posts, I’m pretty sure my letter stinks and is why I get rejected. I feel like an excited puppy chasing my own tail and equally terrified that when I bite, I am going to get hurt. I need to conquer my fear and be brave.

Conclusion

I was in two minds whether or not to do Camp NaNo as I knew I had a lot on already this month.

With a grand total of 9,886 words, I think it is pretty impressive what I achieved despite all the distractions. If I hadn’t given it a go, I may not have written anything this month.

I also feel the challenge has kept me in touch with my novel so when things calm down in a few weeks, I can dive straight back in.

How did your July writing goals go? Did you do Camp Nano?

If you liked this post, you may enjoy:

My plans for the third quarter

Felixstowe Book Festival – The Publishing Industry

#PitMad June 2019 Summary

YALC Prep

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Book Review: Save the Cat – Writes a Novel

Author:  Jessica Brody

This book came highly recommended on Instagram and when Bethany Atazadeh and Brittany Wang did their #STCExperiement – YouTube videos of them using the book to outline a novel – I decided I had to get it so I could join in.  

What is the book about?

The book is based on books by Blake Snyder who writes guides for scriptwriters.  Jessica identified that the best novels use the same structure.  In this guide to writing she adapts the ‘Save the Cat’ beats for novel writing.  She also gives plenty of examples form best sellers – even if you haven’t read them you will know their names.  

How it works?

This guide splits the novel into four Acts.  Each act is broken down into beats.  The Beats have names and descriptions to prompt you what needs to be happening in your novel.  

Once you read the book you will start noticing the beats in films you watch.  It is a real eye opener. 

How I used it?

Editing (Jewel of the Sea)

When the book arrived I had just decided that Jewel of the Sea needed yet another edit!  I wanted to re-write the ending, however, that’s not as easy as just jumping to the end and writing it.   There are little details that need to be woven in throughout the novel.

After reading STC, I created a spreadsheet based on my word count and used the percentages to see where certain beats should be happening.  It turned out I had a lot of the beats but in some places my pacing was off.  I then used STC to help with that.  

Plotting Act 1 (Scarlet Dresses)

For Camp NaNo April, I used STC to draft out the first Act for a new novel called Scarlet Dresses.  During the challenge I made a really good start on this novel.

My only hold up was that I felt my characters were a bit flat as I had not spent long enough developing them.  I feel the story had got potential so I plan to return to this project and complete it… one day.  

Plotting and editing (Diamond in the Sky)

This month, I decided to do Camp NaNo July.  Jewel of the Sea is out with Beta Readers and I need to start thinking about writing the next novel in my shifter series.  Now, Diamond in the Sky has been started but never finished.  Now I am more familiar with STC, I decided to use it for both editing and plotting.  

To start with I need to edit what I already have.  I have used STC to plot the first Act and created my spreadsheet to check the pacing is right.  There are a few instances where it is slightly off and I have noted this on my spreadsheet to check later.  First, I want to get the novel written.

The next step will be to use STC to plot the rest of the novel – the unwritten chapters.  I will use STC to check that when I create the different beats that I am getting the pacing right.  

Final thoughts…

This book has changed the way I write.  I have always been a pantser and found editing incredibly hard.  Writing without a plan often can take you off on wayward paths that are not necessary or haven’t been preempted to create the right impact.  This results in a lot of editing – something I hate. 
 
With STC, I feel have a guide keeping me on track and I can check my pacing is working.  Previously, my outline was incredibly brief and left a lot of gaps for me to fill but having a plot keeps me on track and I don’t get stuck.  
 
If you need help plotting and with pacing, then I highly recommend this book.  Now, it is always close to hand and I wouldn’t write a novel without it.  I love it.  
 
Do you have any writer resources that you swear by?

If you like this, you may enjoy:

How I edited my novel – 12 tips for self editing

Where to find great story ideas…

Book Review: Who runs the world by Virginia Bergolt

Book Review: Lion’s Share

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Book Review: Red Queen by Victoria Aveyard

Author:  Victoria Aveyard

Red Queen

This is the first book in the series that I have read and I wasn’t quite sure what to expect.  The funny thing is I first heard about this book at YALC 2017 when they were promoting it with #RedQueenForADay but it had taken me almost two years to pick it up to read.

Please excuse the silly picture, I was not feeling very photogenic after the long train ride to London. 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BXLBzKahLYo/

What is the book about?

The book is set in a world with two species of humans.  There are those with red blood who are treated as a low class species and those with silver blood who are treated as nobles and have super power type abilities.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BwQCzGrnQz9/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

How it starts?

The MC, Mare, is a red blood.  She lives in a family that are struggling to get by and she hasn’t got a job to be able to contribute to supporting her family.  Mare is a thief.  Eventually, when she comes of age she will be sent to war, to fight for the silvers on the front lines with a high risk of being killed.

Mare’s best friend is due to be sent away very soon and Mare decides to help them escape but first she needs to get enough money to pay for their travel.  The risks are high so those that could help them escape have set a high fee.   

Mare’s sister has a good job where she makes fine clothes for the Silvers.  Mare tags along with her to get into the city.  Whilst there a terrorist attack takes place causing bedlam.  Mare panics and tries to pick a pocket but gets caught.  Her sister takes the blame to save her and has her hands broken, resulting in losing her trade.  The girls return home with very bleak prospects.

An unexpected request comes for Mare to come and work at the palace.  This will save her from war and give her family money to survive but she will have to leave them behind.

The middle

Early on, Mare discovers she is different from other Red Servants when she accidentally manipulates lightening.  She earns the nickname Little Lightning Girl and the attention of the Queen.  

The Queen fears that news that a red could have powers will encourage the rebels so she marries Mare to her son and concocts a story about how Mare is a silver that was raised as a red.  

Mare is watched by the Queen’s guards and the cameras in the palace.  She has to keep up the ruse but despite falling for the princes (both of them), her heart is still red and wants revenge for her kinds spilt blood.  Under the watchful eyes she seeks to join the rebels and take down the silvers from the inside.

How it ends

I don’t want to spoil it for you but there is a big battle where the odds are not in Mares favour. 
 
She is placed in an arena for her execution where, for entertainment, selected silvers will use their powers to torture her before her end.  Mare will have to battle them all if she is to live.

Final thoughts…

I wish I had read Red Queen by Victoria Aveyard sooner.  If you like powers, submersible world building and a touch of romance then give this YA Fantasy is worth a read.
 
Can you guess my next read? There’s a sneak peak in the photo.
 
 

If you like this, you may enjoy:

Book Review: Who runs the world by Virginia Bergolt

Book Review: Lion’s Share

Book Review: The Gender Game

Book Review: Rebel of the sands

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The Story Snippets Challenge

I love the photo prompt challenges on Instagram, especially those that inspire and encourage me to share my writing.

The #StorySnippetsChallenge was hosted by the following authors on Instagram: @amandalyncreek , @bridieblake , @jjotisauthor , @sireyourstory and @son_dae_writes .

View this post on Instagram

Tomorrow is the start of #StrorySnippetChallenge. I'm going to join in. To find details of the writers hosting the event and how to take part, see below: Repost from @amandalyncreek using @RepostRegramApp – So excited to co-host the #storysnippetschallenge with @bridieblake, @jjotisauthor, @sireyourstory, and @son_dae_writes! ⁣⠀And a big thanks to @authorbrittanywang for bringing us together in her Patreon group. ⁣⠀ The challenge will happen during the week of May 20th- 26th if you want to join us. This will also be the first time I reveal anything about my work in progress. I'm what I like to call nervcited to share, although I've received good feedback so far from my teacher and my classmates. 😜⁣⠀ ⁣⠀ Each day of the challenge has a prompt and a corresponding hashtag. Here they are:⁣⠀ ⁣⠀ Day 1: #MeettheMainCharacter (tell us anything you want about your protagonist!)⁣⠀ Day 2: #TeaserTuesday (Share something that will make your audience want to read your work in progress!)⁣⠀ Day⁣ 3: #SettingSetup (Describe your world/setting to show the mood/tone of your WIP)⁣⠀ Day 4: #FirstLines (She a snippet of the beginning.)⁣⠀ Day 5: #ThemeStated (What's your overall theme in your WIP?)⁣⠀ Day 6: #ExcitingMoment (This can be your inciting incident or midpoint. No spoilers, though.)⁣⠀ Day 7: FunDialogue (Show off one of your favorite conversations in your WIP)⁣⠀ ⁣⠀ If you're an author and want to join, be sure to share this image and use the hashtag #storysnippetschallenge!⁣⠀ ⁣⠀ Let's do this! :)⁣⠀

A post shared by Author Ally Aldridge (@redfae) on

My story snippets

Here, in this blog post I am going to collate and share all my snippets in one place that I posted during Monday, 20 May 2019 to Sunday, 26 May 2019. These are snippets from a work in progress so may change by the final edited version:

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sunday

Reflecting on the challenge

I really enjoyed this challenge. It made me think about different parts of my story. I’ve lost count of the number of times I have edited my manuscript but I was still checking over and fine tuning the snippets before posting.

Most of all, I love sharing my writing and this was a great opportunity to give my followers snippets and tease them into wanting to read more. I think using snippets like this would be a great way to promote a published book too as it gives people a taste of your writing and the story, like a little appetiser.

It was great fun seeing what others writers were working on too. Writing a novel can be lonely but taking part gave a sense of being part of something bigger – I was not alone in my writing journey. It gave something to connect with other writers over.

I was flattered when someone commented on how much they liked the way I presented my snippets. This was a huge compliment as I am no professional. They are all created for free in Canva. On Thursday, I created my image in Canva and then used the Video Typer app to animate my text – again this was free.

Have you ever shared snippets of your novel?

If you enjoyed this, you may enjoy:

Create with Canva Beginners Course Review

Instagram For Writers — Ally Aldridge

April, I featured poets – what’s next?

Camp NaNoWriMo Diary (midpoint April 2019)

Camp NaNoWriMo Diary (middle to end)

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YA Author Spotlight!

Look at who got featured!

Author CL Walters was looking to feature writers from Instagram on her blog and I got picked. You can read her post about yours truly by clicking here.

She is the author of two novels that can be bought from Amazon.com:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BvhOTJGnKw_/

Swimming Sideways by CL Walters

What do you do when your world has fallen apart, and there doesn’t seem to be a way to put it back together? Abby Kaiāulu (Kaw ee aw oo loo) gets the chance to start over when her family relocates from Hawaii to a small town on the Oregon coast. But she’s hiding a secret. Leaving the past and the cultural lessons of her Hawaiian grandfather behind, Abby redefines who she is to hide it. There’s Good Abby – she makes and follows the rules – and there’s Bad Abby – she always questions them. But both leave Abby wondering: which one is she really? Her road of self-discovery takes her on a journey where she must discover the truth of who she is as a daughter, a sister, a woman, a Hawaiian and as a friend. But just when she thinks her world might be coming back together, it falls apart all over again.

https://www.amazon.com/Swimming-Sideways-Cantos-Chronicles-Walters/dp/172408710X

The Ugly Truth by CL Walters

Seth Peters has been angry for a long time. Living with an abusive, alcoholic father has that effect. But when he wakes up in a hospital – outside of his body – due to an accident that he doesn’t remember, Seth is no longer angry; he’s terrified. When his memories begin to return, he is confronted with a legacy of lies he’s constructed to survive the pain of his own life. Realizing he’s no different than the man he’s loathed his whole life, Seth’s learns that his choices have set into motion far-reaching and terrible consequences for the only true friend he’s ever had, Gabe Daniels. Challenged with wallowing in the pain or confronting his fears and admitting to the ugly truth about himself, Seth must decide if facing what he fears most to save his friend’s life is worth the risk of losing his own.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1520940459/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i0

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